Number One or Number Two? A Missing Scene from Star Trek Beyond
by Doctor Beth
Summary: While McCoy and an injured Spock are wandering around Altamid, Spock has a problem and needs McCoy's help. This takes place between the cave scene and when they are rescued by the Captain. I also really like to embarass Spock. This is part of a much larger story which has been published in my novel "Well That's Just Typical which was published as a fanzine.


Spock looked utterly worn and McCoy was carrying more and more of Spock's weight. He really wasn't sure how much longer Spock could keep going.

Spock stopped so abruptly that McCoy almost overbalanced and stumbled. He was getting tired as well.

"C'mon, let's rest a minute." He led Spock over to a nearby rock and McCoy was even more concerned when Spock didn't object.

Spock sank gratefully onto a rock, lay his head back and closed his eyes.

McCoy sat down next to him.

Spock sighed, then grimaced, and leaned forward. "Doctor, I am in need of your assistance," he said with a trace of reluctance in his voice.

"Is the pain getting worse?" McCoy was worried. He was so limited in his ability to help right now.

"I believe I need to use the facilities," Spock said quietly.

McCoy immediately knew what Spock meant and he so disliked the terminology. When Kirk had started going on away missions, they had come up with terms for urinating and defecating. The 'reason' for using the term was to keep from offending the natives they met on away missions where sometimes misunderstandings could be caused by innocent remarks.

"I still don't understand why we can't use nice normal terms like 'using the head', 'bathroom', or even 'throne room'. I mean I can understand not using words like the 'crapper' or even 'the little boys room', but the facilities? I mean come on." McCoy was just trying to lighten the mood.

Spock glared at McCoy. "Doctor, it is a matter of some urgency."

"Oh right. What do you need me to do?"

"I do not believe I can stand up without support. I have been trying to suppress the urge for some time now, but I can not do so for much longer."

"Right." McCoy couldn't help it when he added, "So, do you have to do number one or number two?"

Spock looked startled, but McCoy could see that Spock knew exactly what he meant. "Number one," he said softly, then continued, "I do not believe I can do it from a seated position."

"Okay, that's easier at least." He pulled Spock's arm around his shoulder and hauled him up. "Here's the plan. I'm going to walk you over to that large rock, and you're going to lean on it."

McCoy led Spock over to the rock, helping him to lean there. Do you need my help to uhmm?" McCoy let go of his arm and started fumbling with Spock's pants.

Spock stiffened. "I do not need assistance in the matter."

"Spock, I am a doctor. It's not like I haven't seen it before." McCoy was quite sure that Spock had never been injured severely enough before to need help in urinating.

"I am perfectly capable of-"

"Spock, you can barely stand."

"Doctor, please?"

"Okay, okay." McCoy stepped back and turned to give Spock privacy. He then called over his shoulder. "Let me know if you see any blood.

After a moment, McCoy heard the distinctive sound of urination.

"I am done now," Spock said a moment later.

McCoy moved back to the Spock's side, bracing the Vulcan's arm around his shoulder again. "So, was there any blood?"

"There was not."

McCoy sighed in relief. "Well, that's something at least."

They continued the painful walking. McCoy was supporting more and more of Spock's weight and he could tell Spock was starting to give up.

"So, uh, how did you know about the terms 'number one' and number two'? They are old earth terms and are not commonly used anymore."

Spock sighed. "My mother taught me those terms. Vulcans are trained to control their bodily functions at a younger age than human children. When I was two, we traveled to Earth to visit my mother's relatives and I had several cousins who were my age. They were in the process of being 'potty trained' as you call it, and I was informed of the terminology and process."

McCoy was touched by this simple story. "I would very much have liked to meet Lady Amanda. She sounds like she was a remarkable woman."

"She was."


End file.
